A New Year

I can't believe it has been MONTHS since I last put in an entry! Did the blues get that bad?

Since August here's what's happened:

• started therapy
• started an antidepressant
• took Eric to his NYPL summer reading program party
• had a great Labor Day weekend in the City
• visited parents in VA
• went to the National Holocaust Memorial Museum
• celebrated Eric's first birthday
• threw a big birthday bash for Eric
• celebrated Rosh HaShana
• agonized through all three Sorkins having colds at the same time
• fasted on Yom Kippur
• marveled at Eric finally crawling on all fours
• celebrated Sukkot
• missed Simchat Torah because we were exhausted
• welcomed the arrival of fall (my favorite thing)
• put Eric in a leopard costume for Halloween
• took Eric to his first Halloween party
• watched Eric take some steps on a Thursday night and then watched him "really go" at synagogue the next Saturday
• made plans to "kasher" our kitchen... we are going kosher!
• had some long-distance friends and family over
• celebrated a brand-new start for our country

And I guess that's it. We're already in November. NOVEMBER.

Holy smokes. I can't believe it.

It's been a chock-full two and a half months. And it hasn't all been that easy.

I've felt an acute loneliness that hasn't been around in awhile. I miss my friends. My single friends. I'd love a phone call from more than one of them. I'd love one of them to invite me out to something. Just something. Even if I had to say no, I'd still love the invitation. I feel a little sad, too, with Michael's best friend having disappeared from our lives. I know it's "different for men," but I'd still like to see him with a faithful near-by friend.

It's been weirdly hard to make new friends. I wish I could put my finger on it, but it's like being in high school all over again. Trying to make friends- long-lasting friendships- hasn't been the easy thing I thought it would be. And I just have to leave it at that.

Just keep trying....